It’s the beginning of a new year. This is the time when people are shouting “new year, new you!” with the expectation that everything will change because the date has clicked over to a new year. However, we know that internal change is where we find our power. This is becuase it’s a choice rather than a reaction. That puts you in the driver’s seat. So, if you want to make some changes, start with some questions. Here are some questions that might change your life if you take the time to read, reflect and identify some first steps.
1 What’s Important to You?
We can find ourselves living lives to please others. We do things that need to be done. No one else is doing them, so it falls to us. This can be the most mundane tasks like grocery shopping to social expectations around having children at a certain age or the career we follow. Take the time to ask – what is important to me? What are my values? What’s important to me? What do I want to do in the situation? We can’t always do what we want to do, when we want to do it. But, knowing what that is can shape our decision-making processes and goal setting.
2 What Refreshes You?
Doing what restores your soul will impact the quality of your life. If you can do more of what brings you life, you’ll find more joy and fulfillment. In difficult times, leaning into refreshing activities will help you cope, lower stress and make things more bearable. This is a mental health and wellbeing game changer. If you don’t know the answer to this question, try some different things until something clicks with you. It’s worth it.
3 What’s Your Love Language?
Gary Chapman wrote a book called The Five Love Languages. It discusses how people express and receive love and groups those demonstrations of affection into 5 areas. The theory is that once you know what makes you feel loved, you can ask those around you to love you in that way, therefore increasing your connection. Knowing your love language is the first step, communicating it to your loved ones is the next. They are 2 separate processes. Discovering what makes you feel loved and then receiving love in your preferred way can make a real difference in your relationships, strengthening and enriching them.
4 What Do You Feel?
Emotional intelligence and self awareness are basic building blocks for navigating relationships of all kinds. Knowing what you feel and why, opens a door to moving beyond reactive living into a more responsive way of life. Understanding your body’s reactions to stress and anxiety can help you head off emotional outbursts as you put some strategies into place to deal with overwhelm. Expanding your emotional vocabulary assists you to express to others the nuanced feelings you are experiencing and increases mutual understanding. There are plenty of tools, books and podcasts on this topic to help you learn more in this area.
There are many, many more questions that might change your life if you consider them. This is not an exhaustive list. The next step is to make changes according to the answers. That’s when the adventure begins!
