Triggers and glimmers are concepts which can assist us process emotions, regulate ourselves and lead to a life in which we’re able to manage difficult situations more easily.
What is a trigger?
A trigger is a sensory input (sight, sound, taste, touch, smell or experience) that reminds us of a negative or harmful situation from our past. We can find ourselves transported back decades to a fight, an unsafe place or a hurtful conversation in an instant. The feelings and emotions that we experienced then revisit us in the present. We may find that our body trembles, we can smell the same smells and even see the same things in our mind’s eye. The same thing is not happening now, but we are so reminded of it that it may as well be our current experience.
In short, a trigger takes us back to a negative situation in our mind and emotions.
Triggers can cause us to react in ways that appear to be unreasonable or over the top to those who are with us in the present. They don’t know why we are shouting or feeling afraid because, to them, there is no threat.
What is a glimmer?
A glimmer is a sensory input (sight, sound, taste, touch, smell or experience) that reminds us of a positive or helpful situation from our past. Feelings of safety, love, acceptance, fun, joy and peace can revisit us if the current situation reminds us of them.
In short, a glimmer takes us back to a positive situation in our mind and emotions.
As parents, it is really important to build glimmers into your child’s early years, and further into their teenage years. As adults they will be able to draw upon these feelings to build resilience and confidence at times that they are afraid or unsure.
For us as adults, it is not too late to increase the glimmers in our lives. Intentional creation of positive experiences will be beneficial in times of adversity. Triggers can be better managed by those who have glimmers. Self awareness is the first step as you recognise a reaction to a trigger, and then learn how to self-soothe and access more positive responses.
If you notice that you’re reacting to triggers rather than to the actual situation you find yourself in, talking to a counsellor can help you. A counsellor can also help you build self awareness as well as finding ways to add more glimmers into your life in a safe and deliberate way.
